Archive of Our Own Fic Spock/Uhura(past) Spock/Jim

[buxombard]

The fic i'm looking for was on AO3 and complete, written in English. In it Uhura and Spock were married and have a daughter who is around 3 or 4 in it. Jim has been in love with Spock for years but never said or did anything because he was happy and obviously in love with Uhura. Uhura dies on a mission, if I remember right she takes a Klingon disrupter blast meant for Kirk (the one that basically disintegrates you or whatever so there isn't even a body). Uhura has a letter/vid that goes to Jim in the event of her death asking him to take care of her family. Jim, still dealing with his grief over losing a friend and guilt that she died for him is struggling to be there for Spock (who he is in love with) and his daughter who thinks of him like an uncle. He try's working through this by writing letters to Uhura's email account thinking they will never be read and using it more like a therapy tool. They're on leave in the fic for the holiday's while on Earth and Spock and Jim go ahead on the trip to a house in Australia while Spock's daughter is staying with Sarek in San Fran at the Vulcan Embassy for reasons I can't remember. While sightseeing on the outback they are caught in a sudden storm and find a cave with an underground pond/lake or something. They have a moment and have sex there (Spock making the first move if I recall right) only for things to get awkward afterwards. Jim confronts Spock and Spock blames Jim saying he initiated it and throws it in his face that he's been reading the letter's Jim's been writing to Uhura claiming Jim had to know Spock would read them since it was his late wife's email after all. There is a knock down drag out fight and Spock says some pretty horrible things to him. They spend the next day or two not talking and avoiding each other until Sarek arrives with Spock's daughter and with Sarek and the kids help they manage to work things out.
Anybody have any idea what this fic is called or who wrote it? I have been going through fic's like crazy on AO3 trying to find it but so far no luck! Please help put me out of my misery!

Thx,
Jean