looking for a TOS K/S fic

[snowlight.livejournal.com]

I am looking for a TOS fic that I once read on the ksarchive. The part I remember most clearly from the fic was a scene where Kirk was, for some inner demon reasons, very rough on Spock during sex one night (they were in an established relationship and Spock just took it). The next morning, he woke up horrified at what he had done, but found Spock sitting downstairs drinking coffee as if nothing had happened. Instead of being relieved, Kirk was even angrier now because Spock just took his abuse, which he believed to be the sign of an unhealthy relationship.

If anybody can help me find this fic, it would be most appreciated. :D

Comments

[une-funambule.livejournal.com]

Ah, yes! I've been thinking about it for a while and I finally found it! It's "Da Capo Al Coda" (http://www.ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=1097) by the same Anna Amuse you recced at kirkspock. The scene you describe is in the middle of the third part (http://www.ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=1097&textsize=0&chapter=3) (beginning with "He was very rough with Spock that night.")

And I must confess, I couldn't bear to read the whole story, only looked through. I agree that the fics which Anna Amuse publishes at ksarchive are wonderful and shiny and delicious. But they are, mostly, fluff. As I understand, her main work is a long and VERY angsty storyline (published at fanfiction.net) which I can barely bear to read (and "Da Capo al Coda" is part of it).

I always wanted to ask someone about her: it's a really unusual take on K/S relationship, everyone else seems to write pure undiluted fluff when compared to Anna's stories. And I really don't know how to take it. Mostly, struggle not to believe it... What do you think?

[snowlight.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much. <3

I think a lot of the K/S shippers go for the "always shall be" route. I mean, as I understand it, that is what the ship is famous for. I have not read Anna's work on ffnet, though if I recall correctly her works on ksarchive have certain angsty elements too. When I read it I more or less just attached "but it will all work out in the end" in my head. With that said, I categorically will not read anything that, in my mind, qualifies as "breaking them up"—I kind of just shove it off the edge of the map.

Come think of it, all of my own K/S stories would be what you describe as fluff (in the sense that they have the near-perfect relationship, I guess). The thing is, in almost all of my previous fandoms, I was known as a heartbreaker. I think it speaks to the power of K/S that it could convert me into....well, non-angst-writer. :)

[verizonhorizon.livejournal.com]

I was searching for this too, b/c I remembered it...I skimmed that very story and couldn't find the scene, so then I thought I was crazy. Yay that you did! As for her works...they hurt...so...much. They're not fics I reread, b/c I usually only reread happy-ending fics, but they are pretty unforgettable!